


How Milk Bread Ruined Tendou Satori's Life

by remywrites (orphan_account)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-05
Updated: 2017-04-05
Packaged: 2018-10-15 05:31:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10550896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/remywrites
Summary: Tendou has some regrets.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kaiyou](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaiyou/gifts).



> A writing warm up with Kai turned into milk bread theft turned into this. (Go check out their fic from this prompt, it's really adorable.)

When Sugawara and Tendou arrive at the apartment, tired after a full day of classes, Oikawa is waiting for them.  
In front of him lies an opened wrapper, sitting innocently on the coffee table. Oikawa’s gaze lifts from the wrapper to them as Sugawara gently closes the door. He looks angry, but not the kind of angry Sugawara’s accustomed to, with a dangerous, stormy expression and words that cut like knives. No, Oikawa is quiet now, arms crossed and sat comfortably on the couch.  
He gives them both a searing look over the top of his glasses, and Tendou turns to run. Sugawara catches him around the waist. The taller’s pleading look of fear isn’t enough; Sugawara’s expression is as cold as ice. Tendou swallows, and turns to face his other roommate.  
“There’s no use denying it, Tendou,” Oikawa says, and his voice is calm. It’s infinitely more terrifying than any other tone of voice Tendou’s heard him use in his four months of living with him.  
“We told you the rules when you moved in,” Sugawara continues from behind Tendou, in a tone that matches Oikawa’s eerily.  
“Milkbread,” Oikawa gestures to the empty wrapper in front of him with a hand, gazing at it with an almost forlorn expression, “is off limits. And yet, I found this while looking for my alien plushie in your room this morning.”  
Tendou feels his stomach sink. He’d meant to take the cursed wrapper with him that morning to throw away far from Oikawa’s prying, all-knowing gaze, but his alarm clock hadn’t rung and he’d been in such a rush.  
He wonders what everyone will say at his funeral.  
He looks desperately back at Sugawara, but the man’s expression is unforgiving, and he gently shakes his head. “We told you, Tendou. You have to respect the milk bread.”  
“I don’t ask for much,” Oikawa agrees. Tendou considers reminding him that he demands one hour of bathroom time in the morning, needs Tendou or Sugawara to cook for him constantly, takes up well more than his fair share of communal space as his “right”, and forgets to use headphones with whatever videos he stays up watching until 4am on a regular basis, but he’d rather minimize the pain of his imminent death as much as possible.  
“I had my biology midterm today,” Tendou defends weakly. “It was so late, and I was so hungry, and all of the gummy bears were gone, and I needed something to get me through the last chapter-”  
Oikawa silences him with a look and a shake of his head. “Terrible crimes deserve terrible punishments,” he declares, and he stands up, patting the milk bread wrapper lovingly before coming to stand before Tendou.  
“Suga?”  
Tendou knows what’s coming as Sugawara steps around him, making his way in a painfully slow manner towards Tendou’s bedroom. “Please. I’ll buy you more milk bread, as much as you want, just please-”  
“No,” Oikawa’s gaze is devoid is sympathy. “You need to learn your lesson, Tendou. Milk bread is sacred in this house, and you. You defiled it.”  
He can hear his own drawers opening and shutting, knows what the crinkle of wrappers means. He can picture Sugawara’s hands going through his precious drawer.  
Oikawa’s expression has almost broken from its iciness, triumph and amusement turning one corner of his lips up just a bit. Tendou’s always known to fear Oikawa, ever since the first game they ever played against each other way back in middle school, but this-this is on a different level. A line has been crossed.  
He finds the shove Oikawa always needed over the line into sadism when Sugawara, a man others often call the “mom friend” and “so kind” and “an angel”, emerges from Tendou’s room with his full collection of Shonen Jump. It’s an impressive stack. He’s been collecting since middle school, since he discovered Naruto and felt that first sense of relatability, something he’d struggled with around his peers. Every single issue he has, in the hands of two devils.  
He deserves this, he supposes. He knew there would be repercussions. He knew that milk bread was Oikawa’s. Tendou isn’t one for regret, preferring to move past mistakes and look to the future, but the emotion weighs him down like a stone.  
“One week,” Oikawa says.  
“I’ll be keeping them with a trusted friend,” Suga adds solemnly. “You’ll get them back next Wednesday.”  
Screw that, he doesn’t just regret eating the milk bread. He regrets applying to this university, regrets choosing it over the university in Kyoto, regrets helping Suga out with his horrible roommate crisis the first month of school when they’d found themselves in the same economics class.  
“You can both die in hell,” Tendou tells the two devils, and they respond with near-identical grins.  
He’s moving out next week. The second he gets his Shonen Jump back, he’s moving out. He’s had enough of the two devils with their weird sleeping and eating and cleaning and bathroom habits, with their eerie synchronization, with everything.  
Distantly, in the back of his mind, he remembers the last four or five times he told himself that.

**Author's Note:**

> Roast me.


End file.
